Looking back…

Yesterday was the most mentally challenging day I’ve ever experienced. EVER. To make matters worse, it was a Monday, so the day already starts off with a negative rating. Here’s what went down, shot up, veered to the right, and then decided to take a u-turn.

Please keep the following in mind: by nature, I am not a patient person…fertility issues are very time sensitive…I have limited ability to make/take personal calls at work.

Sunday Evening

  • take last dose of Clomid


8:45am Call doctors office to determine next steps, there’s no answer so I leave a voicemail explaining that I’ve finished five days of Clomid, and that we need to arrange the ultrasound, HCG injection, sample, and the IUI.

10:30am Call office again. Again, no answer…hang up.

11:40am Receive voicemail from doctors office, I was in a meeting. They have “scheduled you for an appointment on May 5 at 7:45 for a consult to discuss next steps. If this doesn’t work for you, call and let us know.” My thought, “WHAT?!? This doesn’t even make any sense, and an appointment 1.5 weeks away absolutely does not work.

12:22pm Call doctors office back, knowing they are closed for lunch, but this is the only time I currently have. “Hi this is xxxxxxxxx…I received your message indicating I had an appointment on 5/5/2016, NO that doesn’t work for me. My prior message stated that I finished 5 days of Clomid last night, I need to be seen much sooner than 5/5. Please call me back as soon as possible.” If I was on a phone that I could have slammed, I would have.

1:15pm Doctors office calls! “…the doctor wants you to take another 5 days of Clomid, the we will have you come in for a scan…” …and I cut her off.  “I’ve ALREADY done 5 days of Clomid, and you’re telling me I am to do another round of it?” Her, “oh you’ve already taken it? I’m not looking at your file. So what do you need done?” Gritting my teeth, and fists clenched, I ask “you aren’t looking at my file?” Her, “no, I don’t have access to it, I’m the office manger I was just returning your call.” My blood is now boiling. “I took Clomid, started on day 5. Took it for 5 days, I need to have a series of follow up appointments to determine what is happening with the follicles, as I have a trigger shot being FedExed to my home; which your office ordered, but never advised me of. I was informed when the lab called to make arrangements for payment and delivery.” She interrupts and says “oh I didn’t know any of this. Let me review this with the doctor and I will call you back this afternoon, what time works for you?” In an exasperated tone I reply, “before 2 and then after 3.” “Does 3:30 work? I will be available then to discuss everything with you,” she said. “3:30 is fine, I look forward to your call.”

Once off the phone with her I was seconds away from going postal, and the rhetorical questions are zinging aroundand I’m making snide responses and comments. You aren’t looking at my file, but you’re calling me back? (Idiotic.) You have no idea what is going on? How am I going to get pregnant here?? (They can’t even pick up a phone when it rings OR look at my file!) Where are the other people that work there that I’ve dealt with, why aren’t they calling me back? (Please give me a normal person to speak with at 3:30.) Did she even think to bother to talk with the Doctor before calling me? (Who is she managing, clearly her employees can’t do their jobs!) You’re calling a patient asking her what needs to be done? (Last time I checked, I wasnt the one with the credentials being sought after by infertile couples!!!) I hate these people. We are done with them after this round of treatment, I can’t tolerate the stupidity.






3:55pm and my phone finally rings. Wahoo! It’s the same person I spoke with earlier. Boo. “We are going to have you come in for a scan, and possibly blood work depending  on the scan, from there we will arrange to the IUI. There will be notes for you at the scan to follow up with the Doctor. Does this make sense?” she asked. My curt response, “yes.” Keep in mind,  she’s told me nothing that I didn’t previously tell her! “Ok, do you have any other questions?” she prompts. Counting to three I then respond, “YES. can we SCHEDULE the appointment?” Giggling she responds, “oh, that would be helpful.” To quote Claire Beauchamp from Outlander, I am close to yelling “Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ!!!” The level of incompetency that I have already dealt with is absurd, but this is now horrifying. Eventually, after other inane questions are asked, my appointment is scheduled for 9:30, Wednesday. She then starts to mutter that there is another time available but she doesn’t think I will want it. Only when I PUSH her to tell me that other time, does she say 6:45am. “DONE. I will take it,” I shouted out. Blabbering, “that’s surprising, as I said earlier there will be notes for you that the ultrasound tech can give you, follow those…” I cut her off. “No. I will come in for the ultrasound, the Doctor can review it, and then HE can call me back. I haven’t spoken with him since I was in the office on 4/6, and I can never get the needed information regardless of who in your office I am speaking with.” Meekly she responds, “I’ll put a note in your file. We will see you Wednesday.” At this point, I am hysterically laughing, a note in my file. Right, who will ever see that?

Had I not had such an enraging experience getting the actual Clomid and speaking with someone in the office last week, I might not have been so short tempered yesterday; obviously that was not the case. Can I blame the Clomid for this crazy emotional spiral?!?

This morning, I received a call, informing me of the amount  I have to pay tomorrow for the ultrasound, and that I am to arrive promptly for my appointment. Deliberately I gave one word responses, and the last one was “fine.” Tomorrow morning is looking to be delightful!



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